It's been a year since I have completed coursework.....actually I still have two classes with an Incomplete that had to be done about eight months ago. There is a stack of books I am looking at on my desk with no pages read. Journal articles categorized by topic that sit unread. I books on my Ipad that have been downloaded but still have "new" under the icon because they have yet to be read. SO why am I telling you all this.....
For some reason I feel like I can still do this.....In fact I know I can. I just need to get that spark back. But it's hard like Big Pun says in the song, oh so hard to get going.
Which brings us to the title, "Tales from the Doc Side" and why I chose it for this blog. I am a pop culture junkie and I remember a campy 80's TV show called, Tales from the Darkside.
The way the intro rolls in reminding me of how my mind feels most days. Please before you call the FBI, it's not in a Psycho, wearing my mom's studio 54 gear while stabbing a woman in a shower type of thoughts. Instead it's that feeling of things being calm, having what would seem a good environment to produce material that you are fully capable of doing. However just as you try to actualize that talent a darkness rolls in that clouds your thinking and brings you into an abyss which is often hard to escape and derails your progress towards your goals. This is where I am firmly entrenched at the moment and have had trouble escaping in the past year. Often I am paralyzed by self doubt, lack of confidence, and low self esteem. All three have contributed to my lack of success with my dissertation and current stretch of lackluster performance at work (IMO).
I hope through this blog that I will be able to turn those shadows that creep in towards the end of that intro for that show. By putting my thoughts, rambling, and general opinions down this will help provide some clarity with all the junk floating in my dome. I want to start writing more and more everyday to the point where I start moving and creating momentum. That will lead from the above intro to one more positive like this one:
Only time will tell where this journey will end, but this is a positive first step for the kid.
Stay Classy Folks!
Shawn
